I have an admission to make.....

I am perplexed by boyhood.





Parenting Cass has been somewhat predictable and matches my expectations pretty well. We don't have identical personalities, but I get little girls. I have two sisters and little girl cousins, and of course, played with many other little girls throughout my childhood (and very few boys).

When little Eli was born, I was surprised to find a boy in my arms. I fell in love instantly of course. Apart from nappy changes, parenting an infant boy was pretty genderless.

As I've mentioned before though, hitting two has been a bit of an eye-opener.

Although my love for Eli is ever-growing, my mind is daily boggled by his exploits.

His need to physically test himself is something I give him a pretty long leash on (as long as he isn't trying something completely foolish and destined for tragedy of course), Mama's arms ever ready to catch him (but scarcely needing to.)

Certain other characteristics and habits (and general messiness/destructiveness) confound me though.

One such example is his intense tunnel-vision and focusing ability.

Earlier this evening, I ran the bath and asked the children to undress and hop in.

I went to fetch their pyjamas from their cupboard (2m away) and in the space of 15 seconds, came back to find them in the bath as requested- Cassandra naked and Eli fully clothed, both having a good giggle.

I took a step backward into the hall again and whispered across the room at Stephen in bewilderment, 'Your son is in the bath fully clothed. Why would he do that?? My sisters and I never did such a thing!'

I was not upset or annoyed at Elisha. Just confounded (and also a wee bit trying not to laugh).

So I stepped back into the bathroom to clean him up.

Cass caught my eye and began giggling again. Eli joined in. Then stood up to talk to me. Then looked down, wondering why his body felt so heavy.

He looked at me. Looked at his clothes.

'Mummy! I! Hab! Wet! Cloooooooothes!' and sobbed and sobbed. (My poor baby).

I had assumed he had done it on purpose, but that wasn't the case at all.

So many times I assume he has done something deliberately, when he really just runs into things head-first; heedless, so often.

As I learn about him and his boyish ways, I am resolved to:

Be careful not to allow frustration to show.

Be careful not to sound exasperated when I say his name when I find messes etc.

Let him be who he is and not try to 'tame' him in areas surrounding his masculinity (as opposed to areas of discipline and character development).





Please any experienced mothers of boy/s- do you have any words of advice for a rookie Boy-Mama? Any good book recommendations? Any words of encouragement?




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